Endearment at the farmacia

Don’t you just love these locals? I do.

It’s been months since I have been to the farmacia but that doesn’t matter! In a tiny village everybody (and I mean tutti, tutti) knows who everybody else is, even if they happen to be new to the village and have not had an opportunity yet to know every local. So it goes without saying that while almost every local is a stranger to me, I am certainly no stranger to them! Wherever I go I am instantly recognised as “the Australiano”.

So here I am standing in line to be served, patiently waiting for the two assistants to make all their saluti and help each other to tackle a lovely young lady in prime physical condition who was obviously purchasing a trolley full of prescription drugs for her aging parents.

When it came to my turn and the lovely trolley filler was under control I approached the middle aged female assistant and made my saluto: “Buongiorno signora” and then I added in my best Italiano “Voltaren, cento milligrammi, grazie” at which her smiling face became a beaming icon, exclaiming to everyone in the farmacia an impassioned “Perfetto!”

Here she was, all this time thinking to herself “Here’s the Australiano. Wonder if I can work out what he wants this time.” She showed her obvious pleasure at my efforts to accommodate her with her remark and her ear-to-ear smile.

Then I said “Well I doubt that my next request will be quite so perfetto” because now I was about to ask for cough mixture. Fortunately I had already consulted Google translate and I was able to show her what I wanted on my phone. She thought that was cool, went out the back and came back with two packages. I had anticipated this. She was asking the male assistant (who has some Inglese) how she would phrase her next question which I obviated by saying “Wet or dry?” whereupon they fell over each other with joy seeing that I could read their minds! Then I was half way through telling them that I had no idea whether my cough was wet or dry when, of course, I began to cough! They needed no further information as they both instantly made their own assessment and removed the non-required medicine.

We all thought it went brilliantly. I was thrilled that I got exactly what I needed with minimal fuss, the two shop assistants were thrilled with the efficiency with which they could complete their mission and the people in the long queue were amazed that it took half the time for them to serve the Australiano than it did the locals!